This morning our staff gathered, as we do weekly, to Dwell in the Word. Dwell is a practice we do once a week where we spend time purposefully dwelling in the Scripture for the upcoming two Sundays. It begins with a prayer and then two readings of the same scripture. After that we get to reflect to a partner, uninterrupted for three minutes. Then you switch roles (within the partners) then we come back together as a whole group and your partner shares what they heard you say. Then we reflect on how this process went for each of us individually.
This morning, our second dwell passage was Exodus 2:11-25. During my time with my partner, I reflected on the part of the scripture where Moses is attempting to correct two Hebrew men he found fighting. One of the men says to Moses, “Who appointed you to be our prince and judge?” Then it is revealed that Moses is a murderer and he flees to Midian….
The place I was hung up on was this question of “Who appointed you?” The answer to the Hebrew man’s question is … No one… YET! It would be another 40 years before Moses was actually called to do the work of the Lord. At this point, Moses was just a highly confused Hebrew man who had been raised Egyptian, and having just killed an Egyptian slave driver for beating a Hebrew man. He was trying to put his own kind of salvation on his fellow Hebrews, thinking he knew what was best, when the reality was – that wasn’t God’s plan and he wasn’t ready yet for God’s plan.
Reflecting on a similar part of the passage, my partner said, “As God encounters us we are called to conform – to be in a better position of listening.”
It was so profound to me. So many times I think that I know what is best for any given problem presented before me. I think I know how to fix it all. And recently I have found myself in several situations that in all honesty, just plain suck. There are people in my life that are hurting in ways I can relate to but I can do nothing about. And in those moments all I can do is pray harder for God’s intervening hand. I can’t fix the situation, I can’t make this person act better towards this other person.
This past Sunday I prayed one of these prayers. Being at the complete end of my own rope in helping, I prayed fervently that God would intervene and open the eyes of the blind. That he would make this situation in my life go from broken to complete and to use me in the process.
And God moved. I am not saying the situation is healed, there is going to have to be a lot more prayer for that to happen completely. But there is progress. There has been movement that have happened that I could only dream of. It’s not complete but it’s a step forward.
Sometimes I need to remember that I am the one that needs to be attached to God, not God attached to me.