The best thing I can give to you is for me to go

It’s been a bit since I’ve posted.  Life has had it’s challenges and it’s blessings in this past season.  As I get back into a habit of writing I thought I’d share some older posts that never made it to the blog.  So enjoy this post on relationships written in a season of life that was much different than my current one.


There’s this song by Joshua Radin that features the beautiful voice of Patty Griffin. You’ve Got Growing Up To Do and the second verse contains these lyrics:
Looks like the rain’s pouring down on me
It’s drowning me now
And all I want is to go back home
But this old corduroy coat –
it’s not keeping me dry
But I can’t think of what else to try
I’ve always loved this song.  Joshua Radin is one of my favorite artists because of his use of lyrics to convey emotion or situations.  This verse is a powerful word picture of a relationship that just doesn’t seem to find the groove.

All relationships take work.  But some are just not right for whatever reason.  You fight and fight for it but it’s just not the right fit.  It’s not the best for either one of you. It’s like wearing a corduroy coat in the pouring rain and wondering why you’re wet.  

I love that verse – and how it ends: I can’t think of what else to try.  The solution you’re looking for is an umbrella or a raincoat or to go inside.  Anything but stay standing in the rain in that corduroy coat. It may be a great coat, perfectly worn in.  But when the rain comes it’s only going to make matters worse and become a weight on your shoulders.

There are relationships that are comfortable – perfectly worn in but when the rainy season comes they aren’t right.  They don’t fit the way they used to because what you need has changed. It’s different now, you’ve changed or grown and the relationship hasn’t changed with you.  It’s time to go because you’ve got growing up to do.

It may sound harsh.  Heartless even. But I think that the way there are two vocals – male and female – shows that sometimes it’s mutual.  The fit isn’t right anymore. The relationship was good for a while but for whatever reason, it’s time to move on. Maybe it’s both people, maybe it’s one or the other.  But it’s time.

Maybe it’s time because there’s no moving forward until you move on.  Staying in a relationship that isn’t a good fit can stand in the way of the one that might be coming that is the right fit.

And the best thing I can give to you is for me to go
and leave you alone
You’ve got growing up to do.